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happenstance8
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Name: Thomas
Country: United States
State: Arkansas
Metro: Fayetteville
Birthday: 12/10/1987
Gender: Male


Interests: Chemistry, Math, writing, college, guys, girls, Alanis Morissette, Rufus Wainwright, Ben Folds, Ben Kweller, The OC (but only the first season),The Mole (first two seasons), AGS, Existentialism, philosophy, Death Cab for Cutie, Harry Potter, cool belts, Japanese, checker patterns, Rooney, teaching, test-taking, derivatives, kinetics, cute people, cute puppies, cute Miis, parametric equations, boy-on-boy action, The Postal Service, Fruits Basket, Cake, The Cranberries, webcomics, musicals, videoblogs.
Expertise: I'm pretty good at identifying stuff by its scent.Does that make me a hunting dog?
Occupation: Student, tutor


Message: message me
AIM: paradox222us
MSN: t1f1@hotmail.com
Yahoo: paradox222us


Member Since: 6/25/2004

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Thursday, July 09, 2009

Discrete Sex

A couple of days ago I visited a website where gay men chat with one another, hoping to arouse another man, somewhere in the world, enough that he will, in turn, say things that will arouse them. I don't really know why I did it; I guess I was hoping to be aroused myself but I don't really think I expected to be.

Their names were all so remarkable. "HotSlave4u" and "dirty_dad" and "assplayboi." I was like, "I didn't know that people actually did this."

Some people talked to me. Most of them got bored when I wouldn't let them call me. Why should they call me? A voice on a phone can't be "luv2suk." No voice has that name. That is a text name. One guy kept asking me if I had ever seen any jocks getting beaten up by nerds. That is a weird fetish. I told him I hadn't, because I hadn't, because that doesn't happen, really, but I think I was supposed to lie because he just kept asking, like "Are you SURE?"

I didn't end up really enjoying my time there, sexually, but it was interesting. I keep wanting to go back and just watch them. Look at the usernames, ask them what their fantasies are. There's something so curious about people reaching out for gratification into this weird void of everything humanity wishes it weren't--by which I mean the internet, particularly any part of the internet that has anything to do with sex--and finding other people who are reaching in, too. It's like this weird grimy dirty place where our shadows aren't our shadows, but rather, they are who we are.

But I don't want to mislead them. I don't think I want anyone else, asking me over and over if I am sure I've never seen their fantasy occur in real life. Maybe my username can be "Not_Here_4_ur_pleasure."

P.S. The title of the post is a pun, about math, and privacy. Yessss.


Thursday, June 25, 2009

Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix: A Recap

by Twilight_fan_69

 

Okay so the whole book Harry likes this Cho Chang girl but she's totally sad because Harry, like, killed her last bf or whatever. But then he starts this club where everybody watches him do cool shit and so she gets all impressed and starts totally macking on him. But then he's all distracted because of Voldemort who HATES TRUE LOVE and so he goes on this date with Cho but he keeps talking about Hermione and she gets all pissed, like for real, and meanwhile Ginny starts dating some nobody named Michael Corner. Okay and then a whole bunch of stupid stuff happens which is basically just a distraction because JK Rowling didn't know how to write what would happen next: Cho steals Ginny's boyfriend. And Ginny starts going out with a black dude! You just know she's trying to piss off her mom. I bet it works! Can't wait for the next one!

 

Just kidding, I wrote that, for humor, out of boredom.



Tuesday, June 23, 2009

Ideas

I am formulating yet another fantastic IDEA.

 

And normally I wouldn't bother mentioning it here, but the last time I mentioned an IDEA on here, I ended up being quite DEDICATED to it. 2000 miles worth of dedicated.

 

Still, I think I am going to announce it on youtube. So WAIT FOR THAT.


Thursday, June 18, 2009

Optical Illusions

This blog post is entirely so I can show you a picture I took at a gas station in Minnesota. Here it is:



Now, this doesn't seem all that exciting, since International Parts Dealer stores are found all over the country. But thanks to a well-placed dumpster lid and a profound ignorance of the existence of said IPD stores before this, I definitely thought it was called International Pants Dealer. That would have been much more exciting.

As an afterthought, you should all look at the pentapus I painted on this tile using my own hands and skill and such things: Only wait you can't because the picture won't upload because Xanga hates me. If you want to see it, come to my house. (I am talking to you, Chapman.) The end, forever, until I post again, which will be soon hopefully.

EDIT: If you have time, you should look at this speech: http://web.archive.org/web/20080213082423/http://www.marginalia.org/dfw_kenyon_commencement.html by David Foster Wallace at the commencement of Kenyon College in 2005. I don't agree with everything he says, and parts of it fall into your typical cliche commencement speech boringness, but the parts that don't, if you can sift them out, are really worth examining.


Tuesday, June 09, 2009

Work

Today I am at work. We still don't have internet at the new house, but that should be changing in the next couple of days. I hope. I mean, I am technically in charge of making sure that we get it so really what I am hoping is that I am less lazy today than I usually am.

Brought nerdy trekkie boy up with me last night to hang out. It hasn't been going that well. He gets on okay with my friends and isn't a total embarassment or anything like that, but I think our topics of conversation are running dry. I'm starting to think he and I may not have long-term potential. But then, this is just following a pattern that I very very frequently observe in my relationships, which goes like this:

Step 1: Boy contacts me on myspace or facebook or something, and he is adooorable.

Step 2: Talk online. We have soooo much in common.

Step 3: Meet. He isn't as cute as in his profile picture but whatever, he is still hot and we get along well.

Step 4: Oh god does he like me? He probably doesn't like me. How could anyone like me? He is going to get tired of me and ditch me and I will be devastated, forever.

Step 5: Okay I think he likes me. Daydream about us eventually driving to the northeast to get gay-married and bringing him to Christmas to make my family feel awkward.

Step 6: Actually he is kind of boring. NEVERMIND.

EDIT: Repeat steps 5 and 6 as necessary.

And in any case I have other things I want to do today and instead I will have to entertain him. This is why boys (or other people, in general) are a WASTE OF TIME.

Except you, readers, of course. I love you.

One of the things I want to go do today is look for a keyboard. I've almost written all of my first album, so it's time to start recording... which means I will need some higher quality equipment.

NO SEX JOKES PLEASE.

(Edited because I went back home and he was sooo cute and I went back to step five, and I realized that I usually cycle between steps five and six like eighty times before my head implodes and they dump me for being too neurotic and weird.)



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